Comments on: Vegan Moral Superiority and Other Misunderstandings

By: Melissa

Melissa — Wed, 21 Nov 2012 22:49:30 +0000

I know I’m a year late to the convo but I really appreciated this post. Going through a tough patch with my omnivore relatives around the holidays. If nothing else, this validated my feelings and made me feel like less of a weirdo for sticking to my convictions. Thanks!

By: Marisa

Marisa — Mon, 02 Apr 2012 17:01:59 +0000

I can completely relate to your post. But I’m one of those vegans that won’t say anything for fear of being judged or picked on. When someone asks questions about it I tend to become hostile myself because I’ve dealt with so much already from the people I lived with (family) especially my mother. She had once said I became vegan to make her life harder. If you could email me, I’d love to chat with you some time.

By: MyVeganJournal DotCom

MyVeganJournal DotCom — Mon, 28 Nov 2011 07:33:43 +0000

We stayed home this year too! I’ve been vegan for almost 25 years, and like you, I just wasn’t in the mood to sit at a table with a dead bird. Just too sad, and the thought of it was really starting to stress me out. We stayed home & had a wonderful time, just my husband and I, and it gave us the opportunity to bake vegan food all day! I made my very first seitan roast from scratch and it was fantastic! I also got to watch the live~streaming of turkeys running around at Farm Sanctuary :) So peaceful!
Happy Holidays!

By: Gratitude 2011

Gratitude 2011 — Mon, 28 Nov 2011 03:45:44 +0000

[…] *CK has posted a really good article about her decision to not partake in a non-vegan Thanksgiving on her blog. […]

By: Christie Koehler

Christie Koehler — Mon, 28 Nov 2011 03:41:45 +0000

I’m glad to hear you’ve arrived at an easier place. I do think the feeling of being heard and seen for who we are makes a huge difference, and I’m sure it is a factor with my family.

By: Garret Merriam

Garret Merriam — Mon, 28 Nov 2011 03:13:00 +0000

I used to but heads with my family over this all the time. One year I even walked out on Thanksgiving in protest. I’m not sure exactly what changed, maybe I’ve just mellowed in all respects, maybe they’ve gotten better at understanding me, maybe I’ve become calloused by the other horrible things I’ve seen, but for whatever reason it hasn’t been a problem for a long time. I have moments where, at the table I’ll look down at their food and be struck with the thought ‘that used to be a thinking, feeling being, and now it’s dead because of these people that I love’. Sometimes my mood will drop, sometimes I’ll brush it off and move on, hard to know what makes the difference. I think it’s helped by the fact that, on the whole, I trust that I can have a conversation with them on the topic and they will listen to me and at least for the most part understand me, even if they’re not persuaded enough to change their habits. Since I know I can have that conversation I don’t feel like I have to stand on principle in order to let them know what I feel.

By: Kelly

Kelly — Mon, 28 Nov 2011 02:43:34 +0000

This is a wonderful post, thank you so much for sharing.

Thanksgiving for me is a special kind of hell. This year, I had to excuse myself from the kitchen (while my food was cooking) because I was nearly in tears when my sister’s boyfriend started preparing the turkey.

Nobody is ever even willing to try the food I prepare (and I always prepare enough for everyone). Once they find out it’s vegan, they’re not interested, even if it’s something like pie (I made a killer boysenberry pie this year, I’m the only one who ate it)

I love my family, but they can be very hurtful, and it makes get-togethers much more stressful than they should be.

By: Christie Koehler

Christie Koehler — Mon, 28 Nov 2011 02:05:19 +0000

Thanks, Julia! It’s nice to hear from another vegan who has struggled with these issues.

By: Christie Koehler

Christie Koehler — Mon, 28 Nov 2011 02:04:18 +0000

One thing I didn’t mention in my post, but that your comment suggests is that not everyone immediately thrives on a vegan diet. While I think most people can do very well eating no meat or dairy, I recognize that it’s more difficult for some than for others. I’m glad you’ve found something that works for you, and by having a low-meat and low-dairy diet you’re already doing a lot more for animals than most Americans.

By: Julia Martz

Julia Martz — Mon, 28 Nov 2011 01:49:17 +0000

Great article. You managed to articulate everything I’ve been noodling in my brain this month. I too have opted out from holiday dinners with the in-laws because of the judgmental and snide remarks intended to bully me. Indeed, that’s what it is, bullying. Life’s too short and I finally accepted that I don’t need the drama. There are other vegans in the same boat and we can all have our own little vegan-orphan holiday pot lucks, together.